Letter (08/06/08)




Sebille had found a letter from her bed after she'd gotten home.


She sat down on the armrest of the couch, still holding the letter, though a bit nervously.


Null turned to look at her calmly but as if he was expecting something.


"This letter..."

It made her nervous.


"...I didn't read it."

She hadn't even dared to open it because she knew who it was from but not what was inside it.


" ..."

He turned from her and leaned forward. What was this?


"Null?"


"If that's how it is..."

His voice... she thought it sounded bitter.


"I'm leaving."
"Leaving? Wha... where? For how long."

Not that Sebille had any right to ask him these questions; she'd made it very clear that they weren't anything anymore.


"For good."

Sebille'd throat bulged, as if something had just clotted it.


...And also made her realize how selfish she was: She didn't want him to leave because he was her safety net, but at the same time, she wouldn't give him anything. Especially not now. And he'd never asked for anything, he didn't need much.

Her voice came out a bit squeaky and all she could do was repeat him;
"For good?"


She'd been battling with her decision, and she hadn't been in any kind of a hurry. But now that this was sprung on her, she couldn't wait and think anymore. Finally she'd have to just go with her feelings instead of reasoning.


She tugged his sleeve before he'd had time to take more than two of his silent steps.


He was never one to barge out dramatically like Sebille was, and he turned to look down at her questioningly.


"I couldn't open the letter... because I was afraid of what it said."


" ..."

She wouldn't let go of his sleeve.


"Tell me... do you still love me?"

She was rather sure she knew the answer, because he'd been very clear about it and unless Sebille had hurt him so bad this time that something had changed, he'd still feel it.
Still, she wanted to hear it. She wanted to know that she still held the heart of a stone cold man, who wasn't supposed to care about anyone.


"...I do."

Something inside of her melted and she couldn't take her eyes off of him.


"If it's lasting... if you could make my worrying up to me somehow... I wouldn't want you to leave."

This was the best way she could put it right now. She hated worrying, and it would still keep on making her grumpy as usual. But she'd rather be that way than alone.
Sebille had enjoyed being alone, until now, as she'd never found the same kind of calm with anyone that she had with Null... and now she just didn't want to go back to her old life.


His reaction was simple; scoop her up with his arm and lift to the couch in a blink of an eye.

"Null!"


He was still so unpredictable at times... and she still loved it.


Although, this was rather fast for a couple that had been broken for some time...


...Sebille couldn't help but laugh.

Even Null was almost laughing, but silently in his own way.



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